Tuesday, September 22, 2009


Obama's Top Ten List on Letterman:

10. To keep the budget, I'll rent the situation room for sweet sixteens.

9. I will double your tax money at the craps table.

8. Appoint Mitt Romney secretary of lookin' good.

7. If you bring a gator to the White House, I'll wrassle it.

6. I'll put Regis on the nickel.

5. I'll rename the tenth month of the year "Barack-tober."

4. I won't let Apple release the new and improved Ipod the day after you bought the previous model.

3. I'll find money in the budget to buy Letterman a decent hairpiece.

2. Pronounce the word nuclear, nuclear

1. Three words: Vice President Oprah.

Letterman needs some new writers!

What Obama was really thinking last night:

10. I lied to voters just to get elected.

9. I have change the family dog's name to "Teddy."

8. Black is black and white is white, I am a true Muslim.

7. I would appoint Tony Rezko a (Chicago land developer now under indictment) for HUD Director.

6. I would appoint Glen Beck Director of the CIA just to shut him up.

5. I would have appointed Bill Ayers in Charge of Homeland Security.

4. I hate those 1.5 - 2 million senior citizens and middle - class white folks who Marched on Washington.

3. I recommend all Americans invest in teleprompter stock.

2. Before I leave office, I will pull Fox News off the air.

1. Don't worry ACORN and SEIU your " books and secrets are safe" with me in the White House.

Letterman's staff members have nothing on "our staff" writers!

Don't you agree?